30 June 2005

Europe Gone Wild!

The next three stories just go to show you that Europe's a great place to visit, but you probably wouldn't want to live there.

First, we go to Finland, where universal socialist health care and European moral superiority have led to a strike in Finland's booming paper industry over pay, among other things. Am I surprised? Not in the least.

Next, we go to France, that Utopia of liberal thought, and a veritable Mecca for American expatriates who aren't intelligent enough to understand the Bush Administration's policies. The French government and the European Union are campaigning to "sell" the European Union concept to the French people, who soundly defeated the E.U. Constitution referendum last month. The goal is to "explain Europe to the French", who see Europe as "a 'constraint'... and at worse (sic) a "threat" to their way of life." The French see themselves as French, and not European? Go figure!

And finally, we go to beautiful Latvia (or at least, I assume it's beautiful; I know nothing about it, other than its former status as a Soviet bloc country), where the tourist industry has a downside. The Latvians want the tourism money... But they can't be bothered with all the tourists! Says Sandra Inkena, Director of Riga's tourism office:

"At the moment we have about one and a half million tourists a year visiting Riga, but the vice mayor says he wants that to increase to 10 million visitors a year[...] I don't think we could cope with that. I personally wouldn't like to see Riga so overcrowded."

That's right, folks, visit lovely Europe this Summer, but don't get too attached; especially if you go to Latvia, where the director of tourism doesn't want to see you in the first place! They just want your money!

Ladies and gentlemen, the jokes write themselves.

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