Nicknaming the Ex

We've all done it. Hell, Lycan nicknames the girls he dates currently. I'll post a few, then you post what you've nicknamed your ex-girlfriends/boyfriends, or even your current squeeze.

"Mudflap" - She's the most notable ex-girlfriend nickname, her real name having been Ashley; we dated for a month and a half during Winter of my Senior year of high school. She was so much of an airhead, and so annoying, that I assigned her a name that I'd heard Bud Bundy call Kelly Bundy on Married With Children. The name references the mudflaps on big rigs and some pickup trucks with the naked ladies on them.

"Fat Jessica" - I semi-dated this girl named Jessica, who was a bit high maintenance at times. I was constantly taking her food at work and keeping her company there, or taking her to dinner and whatnot. I was pretty into her, and she knew it, and she basically used me for food. She put on some weight from the time that I met her until the time that she stood me up on my birthday, and then stood me up two days later when she was supposed to make it up to me. Normally I rather like a girl with a little bit of substance to hang onto, but she earned this nickname by being an absolute flake.

Those are the two major ones, "Mudflap" being my favorite. Now post yours, 'cause I know you have 'em.