The Fly: Super Nerd
Are you folks ready to be shocked and amazed at just how cool I am? I contend that I am the king of nerds. The king, I say! I make Sipidation look like a no-talent hack at kinging. I make him look like two checkers stacked on top of each other as far as nerd royalty goes.
Ready for the story?
The year was 2002, and the month was March. I was taking History 320, Ancient Near East. We had nearly reached the conclusion of our study of Egypt, Babylon, Assyria, Israel, Persia, the Hittite Kingdom, and various other ancient nations. Ur, Sumer, Akkad, these words meant something to me during this period of time. This was the second course I had taken under the distinguished Professor Augustus. This is what I'd become a history major for.
At any rate, when I have an idea, I have it big. Some of you will remember the story of my senior prom; that's a story for another time, but the point is that I do things big when they happen. Anyway, I had an idea: shirts. We could have shirts made for everyone in the class who was interested, and wear them to the final exam. Perfect, right? Of course it was perfect, it was my plan. So I came up with a design, made some flyers, and covertly passed them out to the people in the class. In the end I had about twelve initial takers (the program continued into later terms), and I set to work. I did printing for the shirts on my computer at home, took them to a copy place in town to get them reversed and put on screen transfers, and then took them to a T-Shirt shop to have them put on shirts.
The design? On the front, it had a picture of Professor Augustus and the words "AVE CAESAR MORITVRI TE SALVTAMVS", which means "Hail Caesar, We Who Are About to Die Salute You". On the back, the shirts had chosen names from ancient history (mine was Maximinus, after a massive third century Roman emperor who was reputed to have consumed forty pounds of meat and several gallons of wine per day, and wore his wife's bracelet as a thumb ring) and a list of the courses (and academic terms in which they were taken) that each individual had taken from Professor Augustus.
When he showed up for the final, he was shocked and flattered. He posed with us for a picture, which he has framed in his office at home. I have been nerd royalty ever since.
I can't believe how much I rule.
Ready for the story?
The year was 2002, and the month was March. I was taking History 320, Ancient Near East. We had nearly reached the conclusion of our study of Egypt, Babylon, Assyria, Israel, Persia, the Hittite Kingdom, and various other ancient nations. Ur, Sumer, Akkad, these words meant something to me during this period of time. This was the second course I had taken under the distinguished Professor Augustus. This is what I'd become a history major for.
At any rate, when I have an idea, I have it big. Some of you will remember the story of my senior prom; that's a story for another time, but the point is that I do things big when they happen. Anyway, I had an idea: shirts. We could have shirts made for everyone in the class who was interested, and wear them to the final exam. Perfect, right? Of course it was perfect, it was my plan. So I came up with a design, made some flyers, and covertly passed them out to the people in the class. In the end I had about twelve initial takers (the program continued into later terms), and I set to work. I did printing for the shirts on my computer at home, took them to a copy place in town to get them reversed and put on screen transfers, and then took them to a T-Shirt shop to have them put on shirts.
The design? On the front, it had a picture of Professor Augustus and the words "AVE CAESAR MORITVRI TE SALVTAMVS", which means "Hail Caesar, We Who Are About to Die Salute You". On the back, the shirts had chosen names from ancient history (mine was Maximinus, after a massive third century Roman emperor who was reputed to have consumed forty pounds of meat and several gallons of wine per day, and wore his wife's bracelet as a thumb ring) and a list of the courses (and academic terms in which they were taken) that each individual had taken from Professor Augustus.
When he showed up for the final, he was shocked and flattered. He posed with us for a picture, which he has framed in his office at home. I have been nerd royalty ever since.
I can't believe how much I rule.
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