02 January 2007

New Year Return to Zoo Station

I hav made my triumphant return to the desert. It's been an interesting trek.

I started off in hometown yesterday morning, about two hours later than I'd wanted to depart. I drove straight down the interstate, eventually arriving at the California Border. I was making reasonably good time, with a brief pit stop in Redding, California, to visit with my old friend Kelly Rose. As things began to get dark on the western horizon, I began making phone calls in an effort to find an overnight LUP (that's "Lying-Up Point", or "Overnight Point" for you non-military folks).

My first call was to Pseudo-Cousin in San Jose. She informed me that she'd love for me to crash at her place, but that she had been sick since arriving back in San Jose from Hometown and hadn't even gotten out of bed yet. I assured her that it was o problem, and that I'd be able to find alternate arrangements.

My next phone call was to The Manager, my former radio station manager from my early days on college radio. I stayed with The Manager on my way up from Zoo Station to Hometown, and we had previously discussed the possibility of me staying on my way back through. The Manager lives in Stockton, and was my second choice solely based on Stockton's location north of San Jose. On the first run, I'd sacked out too early to meet The Manager's roommate. When I called her last night, she told me that she was working until late, but that her roommate could let me in. I inadvertantely made an ass out of myself by assuring her that I had no problem with her roommate, but that if she was working until late I'd probably be better off staying on the road for the time being.

As The Manager and I were awkwardly ending our phone conversation, Pseudo-Cousin called back, informed me that she and her friends were going out to celebrate New Years Eve, and she wanted me to come to San Jose, go out with them, and then crash at her place. As this had been my original plan, I eagerly accepted. After a white-knuckle drive west and then south on California's highways (which, unfortunately, have California's drivers on them) I finally arrived at Pseudo-Cousin's charming little guest house flat in San Jose. After both of us were ready and her friends, Number One and Number Two, had arrived, we got moving.

I had volunteered to drive; after all, I've never been drunk, don't plan on starting, and knew that they'd want to. I was handed the key to Number Two's parents' Mercedes SUV. I would like to state for the record that, all things being equal, my Chevy TrailBlazer handles much better than the Mercedes.

The ensuing conversation became rather interesting, as Number Two and I discussed global warming. Pseudo-Cousin and her friends are staunch liberals, and... Well, you folks can probably imagine where that went. Highlights included the following exchanges:

Number One: He needs to see An Inconvenient Truth.
Number Two: Yeah, he does.
The Fly: Al Gore is a politician, not a climatologist; he isn't a reputable source of information on climate change.
Number One: Actually, he is.

Oh, and my personal favorite:

Number One: See, you're too conservative. Most girls are liberal. If you want to meet a girl, you need to be more liberal.
The Fly: If that's the case, then I'd rather be single.

We got a late dinner at Jack in the Box, and then finally found a locatio with a few open bars. Having been to actual pubs in Britain and Ireland, I can assure you folks that real Irish pubs don't play rap, or even have dance floors. At any rate, aside from paying a cover at the first bar, and for my own dinner, I didn't pay for anything else all night, and got a bit of outlining for an upcoming writing project done.

After a debacle involving Pseudo-Cousin, Number One, and myself driving around trying to find Number Two, then getting lost, then finding Number Two, we returned to Pseudo-Cousin's place where Number One and Number Two departed. Pseudo-Cousin and I crashed out, got up roughly eight hours later (at the same time, strangely enough), and enjoyed an early lunch together before I hit the road again.

I decided to take Highway 101 past Salinas to San Lucas (that's "Saint Luke" if you're not Mexican; apparently California didn't get the memo that they've been part of an English-speaking country for a couple of centuries now), then take California Highway 198 east, then Highway 33 south to return to Interstate 5. In retrospect, I might have done well to find another route, as 198 was beautiful but very slow. Once back on I-5, I made quick progress until I encountered a head-on collision on Highway 58. It looked pretty ugly, but I didn't see any fatalities; luckily for me, although west-bound traffic was completely stopped, east-bound traffic was only slowed temporarily.

I arrived back at Zoo Station a couple of hours ago, and I'm getting ready for bed in preparation for my first day back at work tomorrow. Expect a Fly Report in the morning, and my 2007 resolutions (and updated long-term resolutions) in the evening.

Thus saith the Fly.

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