The Joy of Bureacracy

You know what's comforting? Being around about a hundred fifteen, sixteen, and seventeen year olds and not being attracted to any of them. In the past, I've been attracted to jailbait on several occasions. During the Summer of 2002, when I was twenty, I went on a date with a sixteen year old girl who worked across the street from where I worked. Although the whole "age of consent" thing tends to be a bit arbitrary, I'd never break the law on account of some under-age girl. That's why it's such a relief to realize that as I age, the temptation is becoming less and less. And what was the occasion for this revelation?

I live around the block from my high school, and I've been meaning to go see my high school history teacher for a few months now. I was unexpectedly back in Hometown early this afternoon, so I thought I'd go ahead and see Mr. Richtoven.

I went into the office at 14:00, knowing that class gets out at 14:40. The head secretary, who used to have a different job in the front office before the main secretary retired. She told me that Mr. Richtoven was in class, and I could come back when school let out. It's a new policy, and it's stupid, but she's the queen of the office, so you do what she says. I went home for about half an hour, then went back to the school.

At this point, the aforementioned queen wouldn't write me a note; I had to stay in the office for three minutes on account of her laziness. Once the bell rang, I went against the deluge of students trying to escape the halls of that enlightened institution. No students left Mr. Richtoven's classroom, and though the door was unlocked (generally a sign that he's there), the lights were out and he wasn't there. I went to an adjacent room, where another teacher I knew is now positioned, and he told me that Mr. Richtoven has a prep period (translation: he didn't have class until 14:40).

I thanked him and waited in Mr. Richtoven's room for a few minutes, then left to go ask in the office. On my way I ran into my freshman science teacher. After talking for a few minutes and noting that this year's freshman class contains a number of thugs who have been arrested for everything from drugs to aggravated assault, Mrs. Richtoven, also a teacher there, appeared. I asked her where Mr. Richtoven was, only to find out that he left the building around 14:00 (funny how that happens), and that he was probably on the golf course.

So, let's recap:

Not being attracted to jailbait: good

Secretaries who can't be bothered to do their job or confirm their information: bad

Thus saith the Fly.