Novelty T-Shirts Temporarily Worthless

I may still buy one of these for later on, but for now they've got a new pope.

VATICAN CITY — Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger of Germany, the Vatican's chief overseer of doctrine, assumed the name Benedict XVI Tuesday after he was elected pope of the Roman Catholic Church following one of the shortest conclaves in history.

Ratzinger — one of the closest friends and advisers to the late Pope John Paul II — appeared on the balcony of St. Peter's Basilica to offer his first words and prayers as pontiff.

The cardinals "have elected me — a simple, humble worker in God's vineyard," he said in Italian to the excited crowd below.

"The Lord knows how to work and how to act … and I especially trust in your prayers,” he said.

The throngs responded by chanting "Benedict! Benedict!" as the church's 265th pontiff appeared following one of the fastest papal conclaves of the past century.

Apparently this guy's extremely conservative, which means that reconsideration of controversial Roman Catholic doctrines is unlikely. Saint Jen of Arc said before they'd announced it that she hoped it wasn't Ratzinger, so I had to break the news to her. As you can probably imagine, I wasn't terribly gentle about it.

The guy's seventy-eight, so we know right off that his tenure will be a limited one. It'll be interesting to see how things pan out.