Captain John, Scottish Comedian Part II

Last week, I posted some dispatches from Captain John, my Scottish friend who is driving with his beloved wife through our beloved United States. As Captain John has travelled, he has sent me occasional dispatches. I received another this morning, so I figured I'd get caught up so that I can post that one by the end of the week. What follows is Captain John's first dispatch from America, my response, and his second dispatch.

[The Fly],

Hello from the US of A .. We're on our third hotel into our trip. We had a good couple of nights in LA, took in the Getty Centre, Hollywood and Santa Monica. We then set off up the coast for San Francisco, stopping at San Simeon where we had a wonderful half hour on the beach beside a colony of Elephant seals .. then on to Big Sur. The road was scarey anough, without the many rockfalls. Annie (being female, is a wimp), failed to see the funny side when I wiggled the wheel screaming "Oh, no .. the steerings gone!" ... I laughed like a drain though. Arrived in San Francisco last night by mistake. I make a mistake with the sat nav: we crossed the Bay Bridge and it took us two hours of traffic jam to get back out. We went back intentionally today and walked the town, rode on a cable car and generally "did" the place in seven hours. Tomorrow we're heading inland for the Yosemite national park before heading down to Route 66 at Barstow. We're driving the ugliest Ford I've ever seen (an "Edge") - I haven't come across a single other one since we arrived; I suspect Budget in LA were very glad to see it head off towards New York. It's been great fun so far, and we haven't driven into anything or been mugged yet. I'll attach a couple of pictures to prove we're here. We're on our way

Captain John

My response:

Captain John,

Good looking pictures, and despite getting lost (the very reason why I don't trust satnavs, beyond the Big Brother aspect!) it sounds as if the two of you are doing quite well. The road down from Yosemite to Barstow (are you taking 395?) is beautiful, you'll really enjoy it. I look forward to hearing of your continuing adventures as you inch your way closer to my digs!

Yank

And Captain John, Scottish Comedian, comes back with:

Blimey .. I can see why you wanted a transfer out of Barstow (and I've only seen it in the dark. Just been nicked (as we say in the old country) by the local police for jaywalking. I expected to have my ankles kicked apart and told to "spread 'em" but they let me off with a telling off. When I waited at the lights a couple of minutes later, the same police car was stopped by the red and was head of the queue as I walked across. I gave them a jaunty wave and touched the side of my nose. They waved back in a "have a nice day" sort of a way. We'll have a quick look round tomorrow before heading off towards Williams and the GC. Yosemite didn't work out for us. We drove up the side of a hill to Groveland where it was snowing, so the passenger made me drive down again, lest we have to spend a week up there. So we took another hilly road over to Merced where we spent the night. She'd got it into her head that the road from Bakersfield to Barstow was mountainous, to the five hours of straight roads and no slopes came as a pleasant surprise to her. Big tail backs because of the lights at Four Corners (?) ... they really should think of a round- about there. I should have suggested that to my new police friends.

Tomorrow, it's farewell California and hello Arizona. Route 66 - here we come.

See you soon.

Excellent. I'll post his latest message - which is priceless - by the end of the week. Have a great day, folks.