Deployment Update

Hey folks,

At this point, I've been out on deployment for about eight full days. I can't comment on matters of business; all I can say is that my current location is a welcome change from the Mojave, even if it's temporary. I miss trees, grass, and humidity; however, the level of humidity I'm currently experiencing is in excess of acceptable, so that part of things is kind of a wash.

During my down time, I've been doing a lot of reading (I finished Diamonds are Forever a couple of days ago and I'm hoping to finish A Bloody Business by the end of today). I also bought and watched Lord of War the other night; although I didn't agree with the political angle that it took, I enjoyed it, and I'd recommend it to action fans.

I ordered on Monday, and received yesterday, my khaki Range Vest from Crye Precision. And, due to some supply mix-ups, and because I've been looking at them anyway, I'm thinking about ordering a Garmin eTrex GPS. As a matter of fact, I can get it twenty bucks cheaper on Amazon than I can get it at Wal Mart; thank God for blogging, which led me to this information in the first place.

I look forward to doing some serious blogging once I'm back at Zoo Station; hopefully they'll give us a few days off once we're back, and from there I can A) vegetate and B) blog up a storm. I hope everyone's doing well; feel free to E-Mail me or ring my mobile, if you're special enough to have access to either.

Si vis pacem, para bellum,
The Fly

"You never took me to any games."

I think this pretty much speaks for itself...

"Missing gnome 'writes' letters, attends game
Sept. 20, 2006 02:10 PM

MORGANTOWN, W.Va. - Allen Snyder's garden gnome is apparently out of jail and now traveling the country. The 14-inch tall red-and-white statue disappeared from Snyder's Morgantown yard in the spring, and Snyder has since received three letters claiming to have been written by "Gnomey."

The latest letter, which Snyder received this week, included photos of the gnome in the company of Steelers fans attending Pittsburgh's football home opener.

"You never took me to any games," the note said. The letter ended: "Have to go now. Boarding a plane. Now, finally, broadening my travels."

An earlier letter included a request for bail money and included what appeared to be booking photos of Gnomey and another of the gnome in the back seat of a police car.

Snyder has no idea who's pulling this prank but said his short list of suspects includes several gag-loving friends.

The plight of his gnome has gotten a lot of attention. Snyder says people are always asking if he's heard from Gnomey.

"I never thought it would go this far," he said.

The story has even caught the attention of officials at Travelocity, which uses a roaming gnome in the online travel agency's advertising.

"While we know that your dear friend, Gnomey, can never be replaced, we're sending the enclosed Roaming Gnome to keep you company in his absence," wrote Michelle Peluso, president and chief executive officer of Travelocity, based in Southlake, Texas. "Hopefully your friend will find his way out of trouble and back to your front yard soon, although we can't help but admire his sense of adventure and love of travel."



Dude, I need to get me a garden gnome.

Jeesh!

I see how it works, if you don't get right on it you get a tongue lashing!

Well, back here in Corvallis, the ever elusive college students are beginning to return. This means serveral things. The least of which is that there are going to be a bunch of hot chicks running around town again! For my business, it means the return of lots of disposable income to be spent in the store.

Business has already been picking up and that makes me very happy. The only bad thing going on is that it is cool and wet right now so the short shorts aren't very abundant.

My own blogspot has suffered because of my website, www.simpsonforsheriff.org, taking up much of my time. I began this website to shed light on the truth in our local Sheriff's election. It has been a huge success and I try very hard to keep it on topic and to keep the integrity at it's highest. Many shady dealings have been going on in Benton County and it is time everyone else knows about them.

I have been keeping up on the National/International spotlight lately but I am utterly depressed by the news and don't really want to talk about it. It seems as though this Country is proficient at getting itself into quagmires. I see the guys every day coming back from Iraq, for the most part they are pretty gungho but I am beginning to feel their sacrifices are a waste of time. This Country just doesn't have the will power to conduct a war to win it.

Desert Rat/Tim

Dragonfly Report: 18th September 2006

Good morning. A wop bop a loo bop, a lop bam boom!

It's 58° Fahrenheit and overcast in Humptulips, Washington. (Check it out - it really exists!) In Cody, the forecast has been delayed due to weatherman Edward "Popeye" Seagullmeister's gastro-intestinal distress. (We didn't need to know that, did we?)

The average price of mineral oil is $1.78/16 oz. bottle; with this drop in price, I'm sure that the locals will be well-oiled in time for Monday Night Football. (Sorry gang!) The exchange rate is inconsequential unless you're an economist and use those numbers to justify your existence.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)/(Useless)

Today's reading is the editorial page of the New York Times. OMG - NOT on TSTF! The Fly is reading "How To Exit This Room In Case of Fire" by the Tupelo Fire Chief and "A Bloody Business" by Jimmy Dean.

Got a girl named Daisy She almost drives me crazy.

Censored Travel Pics - A Sort of Flyalogue

As we all know, The Fly does everything first-class. Since Father Time is an expert in Morse Code, I used my short-wave radio and decoded these pictures of some of the equipment Fly used to surepticiously move from Fly Station Zebra in the Mojave to an undisclosed location at 315 Elm Street in Tupelo, Mississippi.

This is the plane Fly used to slip in and out of major airports without being noticed. In many respects, it almost looks like an ordinary jet aircraft used by most major airlines. However, it has one small difference - a faint, almost undetectable smiley face painted just under the cockpit(s). Only those with high-level security clearances know this so kindly delete this post when you have finished.

This aircraft transported Fly to his temporary quarters where he will reside until the next election. The pilot of this beautiful craft had just returned from a tractor pull, but being a staunch patriot, dutifully took Fly and his contingent to their top-secret location at 315 Elm Street in Tupelo, Mississippi.


Finally, we see Fly in this non-descript, rather ordinary rental car. This is what Fly will use each day as he makes the daily trip from his undisclosed location at 315 Elm Street, etc, etc, to a top-secret military base nearby where he will be training our elite forces in the little known art of ecologically sound foxhole digging.

After Father Time has a few more beers, I will decode some more top-secret stuff off short-wave radio and share it with you.

Safe Arrival

Well, it appears that Father Time, Mo-Licious, and Desert Rat Tim haven't sunk their teeth into their mission yet, though Father Time assures me that he has some diabolical ideas. I've arrived safely at my destination and settled in for the time being. I'll be able to do a post every so often, but it won't be terribly frequent.

Perhaps I can convince Father Time to start doing Dragonfly Reports again, only here instead of on his own blog.

Temporary Flyatus

Patriots,

The responsibilities of my job have caused me to be deployed temporarily. Since I don't have a working laptop, I'll only be able to blog sporadically, if at all, for the time being. In my absence, I'm leaving Father Time, Mo-Licious, and Desert Rat in charge.

Si vis pacem, para bellum,
The Fly

Fly Report: 14th September 2006

Good morning. I wanna taste the salt on your skin, the soft dive of oblivion.

It's 61° Fahrenheit and rainy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 71° Fahrenheit with isolated thunder storms.

The average price of oil is $63.78 per barrel; with this recent drop in petroleum prices, I'm sure that the price at local service stations will immediately reflect a proportional drop (or maybe not). The exchange rate is $1.88 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Revelation 1. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

After the flood, all the colors came out.

Saddam Hussein: Kid in the Hall

Apparently Saddam Hussein is a big Kids in the Hall fan. Why do I say this? Read for yourself.

Fly Report: 13th September 2006

Good morning. I'll forgive you for what you've done, if you say that I'm the one.

It's 64° Fahrenheit and cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 79° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $63.50 per barrel; with this recent drop in petroleum prices, I'm sure that the price at local service stations will immediately reflect a proportional drop (or maybe not). The exchange rate is $1.87 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Zephaniah 3. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

Looking for to save my, save my soul.

Embassy Attack

Jihadis have attacked the American embassy in Damascus, Syria. Early reports say no Americans were killed or injured; one Syrian guard was killed, and eleven others wounded in the attack. Initial reports say that the attack consisted of small arms and either one or two VBIEDs.

|Fox|CNN|BBC|

Fly Report: 12th September 2006

Good morning. If you ever travel back in time, don't step on anything, because even the tiniest change can alter the future in ways you can't imagine!

It's 68° Fahrenheit and partly cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 78° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $65.12 per barrel. The exchange rate is $1.86 for £1, or £0.54 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Zephaniah 2. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

The hands that build can also pull down.

Fly Report: 11th September 2006

Good morning. Let's roll.

It's 64° Fahrenheit and fair in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 70° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $64.97 per barrel; the Bloomberg ticker says "Oil Drops, Gold Tumble Below $600 an Ounce Afters Iran Talks Make Progress", but we all know that's temporary. The exchange rate is $1.87 for £1, or £0.54 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Zephaniah 1. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

Then will there be no time for sorrow; then will there be no time for shame.

Early September News Update

It's about time I did a news update. Here are some stories that I've compiled as of late.

Younger generations of Japanese and Korean citizens, who are unfamiliar with the beneficial roles that the United States has played in the recent history of their countries, are fond of holding anti-American rallies and lobbying for a reduced or discontinued American presence in Japan and Korea. Apparently some Koreans haven't forgotten the American sacrifice for their freedom, and held a rally last month in support of continued ties with America. With so many international talking heads claiming that America represents all that's wrong with the world today, it's nice to see that there are some who are willing to go public with their acknowledgment that America can be (and is) a force for good in the world.

Carlos Ortega, a political opponent of Hugo Chavez's has escaped from prison, and was likely assisted by the guards. All indications are that he'll try to stay in Venezuela and continue his opposition to Chavez. Information about Ortega is sparse, but I sincerely hope that he'll be able to contribute in some way to progress toward democracy and legitimate economic reforms in Venezuela.

There are indications that Congolese uranium may have been covertly purchased by Iran. Such a development would not inspire confidence that the Iranian scheme to enrich uranium is open, honest, and meant solely for peaceful research and energy generation. There are also numerous indications that the Iranian government is supporting the Iraqi terrorist insurgency by providing war materials as well as sniper rifles. Recently, an American envoy to Iraq stated a belief that Iran is using the Iraq War as leverage against the international community; numerous pundits have also hypothesized that the recent conflict between Israel and Lebanon happened at the urging of the mullahs, who pull Hezbollah's puppet strings.

In the recent Israeli/Lebanese war, Hezbollah used the advanced RPG-29. Although the article is essentially an anonymous Russian denial of Russian involvement, Russia and Syria have openly shared military technology and supplies in the past. It's not a far stretch of the imagination to anticipate that the Syrians, with or without Russian knowledge and approval, transferred RPG-29 systems to Hezbollah. More information about the RPG-29 system can be found here.

I have every intention of making another couple of pertinent blog posts tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Fly Report: 08th September 2006

Good morning. On the plus side, at least we've all got these sweet beards.

It's 63° Fahrenheit and partly cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 70° Fahrenheit with clouds.

The average price of oil is $66.66 per barrel; no joke, that's what it says. The exchange rate is $1.88 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Zephaniah 1. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

You're in my mind all of the time, I know that's not enough.

Room With No View

I've said for a couple of years now that I want to have vacation/retirement properties in Cody, Wyoming and somewhere in Orkney. I may have to add another property to the list.

Friggin' cool.

Fly Report: 07th September 2006

Good morning. If it bleeds, we can kill it.

It's 59° Fahrenheit and cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 73° Fahrenheit with isolated thunder storms.

The average price of oil is $67.12 per barrel; I honestly have no idea why oil prices are dropping so steadily. The exchange rate is $1.88 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Habakkuk 3. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

She sees the truth behind the lies.

Requiem for the Crocodile Hunter

I'm sure that there are dozens (if not hundreds) of obituaries floating around on various news websites about Steve Irwin. I just read a fairly good one. My one beef with the article is that I never once saw Irwin with a "mullet", per se; like MacGyver, Steve Irwin had a veritable mane of hair, and it absolutely worked for him.

I have no clue who Steve Irwin was as a person, but the impression that I always got from him was that of a truly genuine, good guy. I wish that there were more people like him, particularly in the media. We could use more energetic, genuine celebrities who truly dedicate their lives to accomplishing great things.

Fly Report: 06th September 2006

Good morning. We'll just tell your mother that we ate it all.

It's 57° Fahrenheit and cloudywith wind in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 74° Fahrenheit with isolated thunder storms.

The average price of oil is $67.70 per barrel; I honestly have no idea why oil prices are dropping so steadily. The exchange rate is $1.89 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Habakkuk 3. The Fly is reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

You say you want your love to work out right, to last with me through the night.

Fly Report: 05th September 2006

Good morning. Making love to you was never second best.

It's 55° Fahrenheit and cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 78° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $68.16 per barrel. The exchange rate is $1.90 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Habakkuk 2, and I've finally actually read it. The Fly is abandoning "The Civil War" by Julius Caesar for the time being, and reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

Like the desert needs rain, like a town needs a name, I need your love.

Crikey!

Steve Irwin, the Crocodile Hunter, is dead, killed by a stingray while filming off the Great Barrier Reef. He was forty-four years old.

I'll refrain from commenting, because this really is unfortunate.

Fly Report: 04th September 2006

Good morning. Bunch of slack-jawed faggots in here. This stuff will make you a gawddamned sexual tyrannosaurus... Just like me.

It's 57° Fahrenheit and cloudy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 78° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $68.60 per barrel; somebody pinch me. The exchange rate is $1.90 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Habakkuk 1, and I've finally actually read it. The Fly is abandoning "The Civil War" by Julius Caesar for the time being, and reading "Diamonds are Forever" by Ian Fleming and "A Bloody Business" by Gerry Schumacher.

I'll see you again when the stars fall from the sky, and the moon has turned red over One Tree Hill.

Looking Out for Number One

When you work three straight weeks, then have a week off and work on a project that winds up failing miserably, what do you do? You guessed it: you head to the book sellers! I set out for the nearest trace of civilization, a Barnes and Noble that's about forty minutes from Zoo Station. I intended to get:

A Bloody Business: American War Zone Contractors in Iraq by Gerry Schumacher

From Russia with Love by Ian Fleming

Bravo Two Zero by Andy McNab

Once I was actually there, I thought better of the third selection; I've already read it, but left my copy behind at a book shop in England. I decided that if I was going to get it, I may as well get it for cheaper on Amazon since I wasn't planning on reading it again any time soon. So, what I actually got was:

A Bloody Business: American War Zone Contractors in Iraq by Gerry Schumacher

From Russia with Love by Ian Fleming

The Iliad by Homer, narrated by George Guidell

I figure that I spend enough time in my car, headed to and from work, that I may as well start getting something out of it. I'll try one audio book, and if it goes well, I'll try a second. I have to say, the pickings were fairly slim; I finally found a section with some decent stuff, including C.S. Lewis, Mary Shelley, Homer, and Shakespeare. The booby prize goes to an audio book of Sun Tzu's The Art of War, narrated by Joe Mantegna. Yes, you read that right.

Well, I'd best get to reading. More later.

Fly Report: 01st September 2006

Good morning. Have you ever wondered why fat parents have fat children? Or why Chinese parents have Chinese children?

It's 63° Fahrenheit and rainy in Kirkwall. In Cody, the forecast calls for a high of 61° Fahrenheit with sunshine.

The average price of oil is $70.16 per barrel. The exchange rate is $1.90 for £1, or £0.53 for $1.

Today's Astronomy Picture of the Day is: (Cool)/(Lame)

Today's scripture reading is Habakkuk 1. The Fly is currently reading "The Civil War" by Julius Caesar.

They say in love, there are no rules; sweetheart, you're so cruel.